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Will I really go to Heaven?

Not a crazy question at all, and I am glad you reached out because it is so so important that you have assurance of salvation. It seems to me that what is lacking here is an intimate relationship with the Lord because if you are constantly in a two-way communication, there will be no room for this sort of fear or anxiety because He calls you by name and you hear His voice everyday in your devotion and prayers. Do you hear His voice? If not, find time to read the Bible and ask Him questions or share your heart before reading so that when He replies you on the same topic, you know He is speaking and you are hearing correctly.



The Holy Spirit speaks all the time -- we just need to listen. Worshipping God is like the water you drink, prayer like the air you breathe and the Word like food you eat. 


We pray without ceasing -- prayer is talking to God. We talk to Him about anything and everything from the moment we wake up till the moment we lay our heads and even throughout the night. Prayer is a two-way communication. Keep talking to Him and eventually, He talks back. We just need to recognize His voice. When God speaks, He speaks to our heart. We hear with our hearts, not with our heads. 


When you read the Word, ask Him to show you which book, chapter and verse to read, close your eyes and wait till you see a book, chapter number and verse number, then open to it. But before that, ask Him something regarding your situation so when He replies, you know He speaks.


When you have a wealth of emotion while you worship the Lord, you are worshipping with your heart. Keep it up. Worship is often the easiest when we feel far away from God. It is refreshing indeed -- like water. Worship a few times a day, just sing to the Lord whenever you can -- like drinking water. Can't let a day go by without it.

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