Killjoy

 Just like reading, writing is a joy. But when we see it as work, they will see it as work. I write stories in my free time and my kids love reading them. I incorporate history into my stories or science fiction. Also, a lot of Christian values.

When children see how enjoyable writing is, they will fall in love with it.

I do not teach my kids spelling. It’s a killjoy. My daughter just loves reading and writing and I do correct her spelling and teach her to mark her own papers. She does the marking while I tell her what went wrong with it. She just did a Year 4 government exam and scored the highest band. She only had one wrong over 29 questions. 

I don’t teach grammar or spelling. As an English teacher myself, I only learn what verbs and nouns were when I had to teach them in class. No kidding.

As for math, my daughter did 2 workbooks and still struggle with it. She scored Band 2. I need a better approach to math. Meanwhile, she is in love with algebra. And only turning 10 end of this year. So I will be changing my approach to math as well and teach everything from the algebra approach just because she loves it.

Zzzz

 Falling asleep without intending to? What you really need is sleep, not a caffeine. Please get some sleep.

I don’t drink anything - no strong drinks, no coffee, no soda. I just try to nap before 10pm. Two hours of sleep after 12am is equivalent to 1 hour of sleep before 12am. So try to sleep early and wake up early, and you will be more rested.

Unto God

 When we look to humans to meet our emotional needs, humans ALWAYS fail. But God NEVER fails. Everyday, when you wake up, talk to Him and don’t stop till you sleep. Even in the middle of the night, when you wake up, talk to Him. The Holy Spirit speaks all the time— it’s a matter of whether we are listening.

Isaiah 41:10 (NIV)

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."

Read His Word day and night. Ask God to speak to you through His Word. Ask Him for a Book, Chapter number and Verse Number, then open to it.

Whoever and however you serve, serve not unto man but as unto the Lord. 

Col 3

[23] And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men; [24] Knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for ye serve the Lord Christ.

As for your kids, praise. Even if they don’t do anything but show up looking pretty, praise them for their looks. Find the slightest things to praise them for, praise them everyday. And you will see a change.

Hope this helps.

Too many kids?

 I think sometimes, it is easy to give in to pressure and be apologetic for something you do not need to apologize for. When people categorize you as someone who is less dominant, even the non-dominant tend to be dominant just because you’re a rabbit. (I don’t have a better term for it.) You’re meek, humble and obliging? You please people? Don’t be apologetic for something God has commanded you to do — be fruitful and multiply. Go ahead and offend them if it has to do with the truth or God’s first instruction to humankind and to you.

In Bible times, women used to bribe (Rachel and Leah) in order to have more kids. Not having kids are a curse. Over the years, women who do not have kids or are single or those who did not want to offend them tried to cover their shame by shaming those who are blessed with lots of children, so the tides have changed, culture has changed and the blessed are the cursed.

Teaching kids about Christ

Just be careful not to turn Christianity into a religion. Testimonies are powerful. Share your own experiences with Jesus — not just the old ones but the more recent experiences with Him so your kids know He is real and watching. Also, family altar is crucial. And most of all your personal devotion, prayer and worship time with the Lord. Make sure they see you do these things. Bedtime stories are testimony sharing times, too. Make long bedtime prayers until they fall asleep but in your prayers, always mentioning about relationship with Him and talk to Him like a friend.

Narcissism

You can pray for them and win them over with the Love of Christ, or you can let go and move on. 

It is always worth fighting for a family member. It is a relationship worth saving. There are ways to deal with a narcissist. Take nothing personally, but love, love, love. And yes, you can do it. Because you have Jesus. Others don’t. It won’t take long before you see changes. At the end of the day, if nothing works, at least you tried. 

Moving away physically does not protect you. It still plays in your mind and has allowed you to be hurt. What will heal you is to heal that hurting narcissist. And if words did the damage, then it’s words that will heal the hurt. Say something nice to the narcissist and keep on at it. Don’t ruin your future just because of someone else’s hurt. 

Even after winning a narcissist over, there are relapses and you have to win them over again but it gets better over time. Just don’t give up.

Forgive the Fathers

Forgiveness is acknowledging what they have done but not holding a grudge; instead, it is choosing love over hate. And choosing grace over condemnation.

Unforgiveness is punishing yourself for the mistakes of others; to ‘do justice’ without actually doing justice. It is name calling and shaming in the name of a grudge. It does not give power or voice to anyone but the devil — the Spirit of Unforgiveness. The outcome is eternal death.

“Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors.”

Mark 11:25-26

“And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses. 26 But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses.”

Matthew 6:14-15

14 “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15 But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

#ForgivetheFathers

No investments?

 If you are worried about expenditure, you are right. Especially if you don’t have any form of investments at the moment. I would invest your savings until it grows bigger. It’s an issue of whether to eat the seed or to plant it. Even if you bought something of value for $350 and sold it for $450, you are making some profit. Consider your investment options - shares, crypto or just plain old fashioned investing like in a lemonade stand or investing in your kid’s businesses.

If your family is dependent on a sole income, without any passive income or even fixed deposits in the bank (which should be the last investment resort based on the parable of the talents), then you will remain in a never ending cycle of poverty. But once you have some form of investment, no matter how small, it is a seed and will grow so that you can be financially independent — not dependent on a sole income — and then to be fully reliant on investments and live to serve the Lord and spend time your kids. I don’t think making money should be your priority until you sacrifice everything else but making money doesn’t always require hard work rather than good decisions.