Hi there, this would have been me when I was 25. I was a pastor and single and can totally relate. I also had my own company at that time, which was like a tuition and homeschooling center while I was the children's ministry pastor and worship led at the main service and preached at youth services.
Hearing God's voice is key. My husband was spiritually much younger than me. And 4 years younger as well. Before we got together, he was a Bible School student, and I was a Bible School lecturer. He also worked for me part time. His first language wasn't English and we couldn't really communicate well. He was from interstate. I knew his parents (church leaders) since I was young but we weren't friends then.
So I guess you can say we met in Bible School but we were barely friends either because of the language barrier. But to cut the long story short, someone who questioned him revealed to me that he liked me so I prayed and fasted about it without him knowing that I knew or why I was fasting for a couple of days. When I got the confirmation from God, I told the pastor above us (my mom), and he was advised to pray and fast about it before approaching me. And he had the green light from God. So then he prayed for timing, and when the time came, he asked me if I would pray about it not knowing I had already prayed about it. And that's how we started.
Not long after, we prayed about marriage and the timing for marriage. And got it. We are happily married with 3 kids now. This month marks 13 years since he has asked me to pray about it. We have been married for 12 years now. I married an acquaintance because even though we were in a relationship, we weren't very close and did not communicate very much because of language issues. It was a match made in heaven. I figured we could spend the rest of our lives getting to know each other and we had plenty of time after marriage to be friends. We actually became enemies the first few years. It took about 10 years before we actually became friends. And hopeless romantics now. I almost called it quits so many times but God knows what He is doing. I remind myself of all the evidence and confirmation that He had given us through His Word while I prayed. And that helped me stay on. I'm glad we hung on because we're much closer now and love does grow with time. I would have done it all again.
Also during my week of fasting, God had already revealed to me about His will within the first 24 hours but the rest of the week, God was just correcting me and preparing me for the relationship I was about to get into. He told me that if any arguments came up between my husband to be and I, it was because of my pride -- because I thought I was 4 years older, and more mature, and English speaking, and was a master's degree holder (he only held a diploma), I was his boss, I was a pastor, I had my own company, etc. I had so much to be proud of. So He warned me about my pride and submission issues.
Over the years, he hasn't been able to catch up spiritually. Sometimes, I wonder if he is even born again or have the same level of intimacy with God as I. But I remember Smith Wigglesworth who used to be a plumber and wasn't born again until his wife prayed through for him and he had a 180 degree transformation later in life before he began his ministry.
One of the best advice given to me just before I got married is that the guy God has for me may not be the ideal 'godly guy' but we have to pray him into it throughout the marriage by being the godly wife.
One of the things God asked me to do during my fast was to bring forth the 'List'. (I once heard a pastors wife said she wrote 49 things she wanted in a guy and they all came to pass - brown hair, brown eyes and all - so I wrote 50 things, hence, the 'List'.) And I wrote things I wanted in a guy like, "Prays and fast once a week, does devotion everyday, prays everyday, reads the Bible everyday, etc." and God told me to start applying those conditions to myself -- if I met those conditions myself or not. And it was a real wake up call for me. I had to lower my standards. I wasn't being fair on him. (Although he did fit the criteria at that time and I probably did too.) But what God meant was that I had to get rid of that ideal mindset. And if I don't, I would be gravely disappointed because I was too idealistic.
So to answer your question on dating, the answer is no. I've had my share of bfs and broken relationships and regrets before this guy, so dating is a no-no thing. Trust me. Don't get into any relationship without the green light. And if you hear nothing, just wait, don't rush. And if you can't hear God, well, then that's another issue that has to be dealt with first because we can't have a relationship with someone we can't hear.
If you need any advice on theology where dating and marriage is concerned, I strongly recommend Phylicia Masonheimer, Ever Woman a Theologian on insta https://www.instagram.com/phyliciamasonheimer?igsh=MWZyOTg4andnemwweA==
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